Does he love me?

by Lonely Heart
(Colombo, Sri Lanka)

I have been involved with a married man for over 4 years now. I knew that he was married when we first met. He has had over 26 girlfriends, and he has been married for 7 years now, has two kids. He loves his children. I know that he was unfaithful to both his wife and me when we first started dating.

At first he told me not to get emotionally involved with him, he said that he does not believe in love. But over the years things have changed, I know that he is not seeing anybody else other than me.

He does not show his emotions, feelings to others much. But lately he has been telling me that he loves me and he wants to keep on seeing me.

He feels so torn between with both his wife, kids and me. I do not want him to leave his wife and kids and come with me, his wife found out about me recently and she called me using his phone. She said both this children and she adores him and that he is a very nice man. She want us to end the affair.

We have met twice after his wife found out about us. Now its very difficult for us to meet. But we do meet whenever we can find time. Both of us are working - demanding jobs and its really hard for us to find time.

I have a son, I got divorced about 11 years ago and have been involved only with him.

This relationship is so stressful, I feel really lonely at times but I don't know how to end it, coz I really love him.

He says that he wants to keep on seeing me as long as it takes.....

Can we go on like this?

Comments for
Does he love me?

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Nov 17, 2011
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i can relate to u
by: zandra

We almost have the same experience. I know the feeling of losing someone you really love. But on the other hand, I know that all these sacrifices will make him happy. We've been together for almost 1 year now. He has 3 kids and married for 5 years. He is my classmate in grade school. We've got a chance to see each other again because of this reunion. He's kind of a chickboy the time we met again. That's why at first, I really hate him. He seemed so arrogant and very proud of himself, but as time goes by I realized that I was wrong. Well according to him, I changed him. We've experienced a lot of fights. I cheated on him on the first 3 months of our relationship. Before him I had a boyfriend for almost 5 years. And because of feeling scared to lose both of them. I cheated on both of them. But at the end, I realized that I love this other guy rather than my first boyfriend. So I chose him. I know that he really loves me, because he forgave me for all of my mistakes. But now, we only have few days left to be with each other. We decided to do the right thing of going back to his family rather than to continue our relationship. Yes we're happy, but as long as we know that there are other people who's not feeling great about this and who's really hurt. We can't really feel this happiness forever. Besides, I want his children to grow up seeing a complete and happy family. I don't want to be the reason for those innocent children to have a broken family. I love him so much, but I have to do this. I still don't know what to do when the right time has come for us to say goodbye to each other. After that for sure, we can only see and talk again after 3 or more years. Because for sure, his wife will never let us to have a communication again and I respect that. And that's one of the most painful part! He's the most important guy in my life. I'm only 24 years old, but what I feel right now is I will grow old being alone. I'm still feeling this thought of not letting him go. But I don't want to be selfish. :(

Jun 10, 2011
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Does he love you?
by: Anonymous

Dear Lonely Heart, I feel for you! I was in a relationship for eight years, for the first three he was married. He also adores all his children, two with the wife and another one with another OW he had 20 years ago. He always said he loved me, he is sweet and caring, we can talk for hours and have shared amazing unforgettable times, but after eight years...he cheated with an old girlfriend from 30 years ago. I found out about the cheating and he said it meant nothing, but continued to communicate with her. I have finally broken up with him for good. You need to forget about your guy, because he will continue to cheat the rest of his life. We deserve better than that. He will always say that he loves you...but he loves himself more.
OW nomore

Jun 10, 2011
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Does he love you?
by: Anonymous

Dear Lonely Heart, I feel for you! I was in a relationship for eight years, for the first three he was married. He also adores all his children, two with the wife and another one with another OW he had 20 years ago. He always said he loved me, he is sweet and caring, we can talk for hours and have shared amazing unforgettable times, but after eight years...he cheated with an old girlfriend from 30 years ago. I found out about the cheating and he said it meant nothing, but continued to communicate with her. I have finally broken up with him for good. You need to forget about your guy, because he will continue to cheat the rest of his life. We deserve better than that. He will always say that he loves you...but he loves himself more.
OWnomore

May 31, 2011
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another OW
by: Anonymous

Mine was like that too when i met him. Now its only me and him. He says hes leaving her but idk..i can't complain. He is good to me. I love him so much I dont know what to do. I know i have to end it. But I feel like a selfish child. I don't want too. I don't know how too. When I see him I melt. I don't want to hurt him. I think i do mean alot to him.

May 30, 2011
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Ball and Chain
by: Latenite

You said he was unfaithful to you and his wife both. First he was unfaithful to her with you, and then unfaithful to you with someone else. Your the other woman. He seems to be a busy man. His wife seems to adore him for what reason I don't know by your description. He's a repetative cheater. Your in for some extremely lonely life ahead with this one. So is his wife. I'd move on. Good Luck.

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