by cotton
(new jersey, usa)

I am 28 years old. I broke up with my ex-boyfriend around this time last year. We were together for 3 1/2 years. It was a roller coaster ride for the first few months of our relationship because my family thinks that he's a player and will only hurt me.Considering that this is a long-distance relationship. It took me a lot of time and effort to fight for him. I truly loved him. He was my life and my everything because I know that he is really a very nice and well-educated man. After a while, my family finally accepted him. All the while i thought, everything is already on it's place. But i was so blind to see that my ex-boyfriend was the one who has a problem now. He cannot accept how my family treated him after everything that we've been through to fight for our relatationship. Aside from him having issues with my family, he always finds a lot of reasons to excuse himself and not talk about what's really happening between us.

Then, the day arrived when i finally gave up and gave him his space. We've decided to cool things off and give ourselves a week or 2 to really know what we really want. But unfortunately, the truth came out. There is another woman involved. She is the sister of one of his friends from where he is. I really broke into pieces when i knew about the truth. I still wanted to fight for him. But then i thought, why would I fight for someone who doesn't love me anymore. All this time, i thought i really knew him, but then again, there are still a lot that i didn't know. I became very close to his friends. In fact, they really took my side and their relationship with him got really messed up. There is this guy who's one of his friends and who's married, whom i really look up to because when they were still close, he's the one who really became like the big brother because he's the one who's married and I might say who has a lot of experinece in life since he has a family already.

We didn't really become close then because honestly, he kind of intimadates me plus his wife didn't really like me at all. I can say he is really attractive, and i can't deny that. If im not 't with my ex-boyfriend and he's not married, he's really my ideal man. We actually lost contact for 2 years. After 2 months when my ex-boyfriend and I broke up, his friend who's married called me up out of nowhere and aksed me how im doing. The moment i saw his name calling me, I really felt something. And by talking to him, he really made me happy. Maybe because I was already attracted to him even before. To tell u the truth, his wife cheated on him 3 yrs ago and left him with their son and her son from another man to be with this guy that she's been fooling around. I was even there when this thing happened. I was one of those people who comforted him when his wife cheated on him.

Unfortunately, the other man left his wife becasue he didn;t know that she had another kid form another man. And his wife came back to him and of course he accepted her again. When he called me up, he was telling me how unhappy he is with his marriage because of what happened. Until now, he still can forget how she cheated on him. He is just staying in his marriage for the kids. While we were talking, he finally admitted that he likes me and later on he told me that he loves me. He told me that ever since, he would always think how it feels like to be loved by me, because he saw how i was with his friend (my ex-boyfriend). The feeling is mutual.

Actually, I really admire how he really fought for his wife and accepted her back for the sake of their son. Now, we've been together for 8months now. This is a long distance relationship again. We manage to see each other every month. We both know we have something really special. And i can feel that he really loves me too. He keeps saying, I'm the missing piece to complete him. The only reason why he cannot leave his family right now is because of his son. He came form a broken family. His dad abandoned them when he was only 10 yrs old, and he doesnt want that to happen to his son at this time. The longer we've been together the more deeper i feel for him. He is a really loving and thoughful man. He keeps telling me that I'm the one he really loves and his son and to give a little bit more time. But every second of wait feels like years to me.

What should I do? Should I really stay or move on? I know we really love each other but im not really sure if he's really willing to be with me. I cannot live like this forever. Knowingthat we are fooling everybody and knowing that they are still together in one roof, it's really killing me. Should I really wait and trust him that we're gonna be together soon? Am I putting myself to another major heartbreak? please help me.

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