No Longer the other woman

I wanted to put my story out there simply because all you hear about the other woman is that the married man never leaves, or that we are homewreckers. Let me tell you the married man i was having a affair with i have know for about 10 years. when he was in highschool he got his girlfriend pregnant, his parents are straightedge so when this happened he thought if i marry her i will fall in love with her and love her, well they were together for 12 years had two kids and he wasnt happy, he tried leaving once, felt bad and tried making things work for the kids and i started working with him about 3 yrs ago, i was engaged with kids of my own and i was in a emotionally abusive realtionship, come to find out later i found out why, my fiance was chaeting on me. "the married man" my now boyfriend, was trying to hold things together finally after i found out that my fiance cheated on me he came up to me and said whats going on?

i broke down crying and told him what happened, he was pissed. Later on down the road i asked him the same thing. Whats wrong? he said i moved back here to try to work things out and i realied i was trying to force myself to love someone who was always just a friend to me. we ended up having a affair.

we planned to just have fun and said we never wanted anything serious, well after the first time we had sex, which was VERY passionate unlike having sex with anyone else, we fell madly in love. i always thought he would never leave his wife, well after a few short months about 3 he moved out of thier place, i left my fiance. Now we are happily together (still secret) cause im in the process of finding another job, but it does happen they do leave thier wifes.

we didnt plan for this to happen and NEVER did i think i would have a affair. I am SOOOOOO HAPPY and wouldnt trade this for the world.

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No Longer the other woman

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May 07, 2013
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WHAATTT??? NEW
by: Married Woman

WHAAATTT??? You are old enough to be married for 20 years and you post this tyraid of judgemental bs??? If you take the time to read what you wrote while coherent you would see that you are not taking responsibility for your own actions. Blaming every wife that has been cheated on for wrecking their own marriages?? How can you say that?? Do you know every woman in this situation?? Just because YOU are responsible for wrecking YOUR own marriage from neglect and immaturity does not mean this is the case for all women out there. You proudly proclaim to be in some other woman's marriage but claim NO responsibility?? It's all her fault that you are in her marriage?? If the husband that you are cheating with dumped you and stepped up to his responsibilities then perhaps his wife and kids would be facing a better outcome for their lives. If that husband tried to stop thinking of himself and put his family first and make his marriage work perhaps he would feel better about himself and his marriage. Some bimbo flirted with my husband at work for 18months to get an easier time at work. My husband enjoyed it and flirted back. That's betrayal. That's cheating. My husband said that there was nothing wrong with our marriage and he is happy. It was just him being selfish because he could. If that bimbo didn't stroke my husband's ego and stayed out of our marriage we wouldn't have had all the pain that goes with not keeping boundaries and respecting your spouse!! you need to respect boundaries and stay out of other peoples marriages. Take responsibility for your actions. Stop blaming other people for what you choose to do. And realize that your behaviour is hurting others including the kids in your situation. Grow up and get a man that is free to be with you. Stop being the home wrecker and acting in such a selfish, destructive, pathetic manner. Too easy!

May 07, 2013
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WHAATTT??? NEW
by: Married Woman

WHAAATTT??? You are old enough to be married for 20 years and you post this tyraid of judgemental bs??? If you take the time to read what you wrote while coherent you would see that you are not taking responsibility for your own actions. Blaming every wife that has been cheated on for wrecking their own marriages?? How can you say that?? Do you know every woman in this situation?? Just because YOU are responsible for wrecking YOUR own marriage from neglect and immaturity does not mean this is the case for all women out there. You proudly proclaim to be in some other woman's marriage but claim NO responsibility?? It's all her fault that you are in her marriage?? If the husband that you are cheating with dumped you and stepped up to his responsibilities then perhaps his wife and kids would be facing a better outcome for their lives. If that husband tried to stop thinking of himself and put his family first and make his marriage work perhaps he would feel better about himself and his marriage. Some bimbo flirted with my husband at work for 18months to get an easier time at work. My husband enjoyed it and flirted back. That's betrayal. That's cheating. My husband said that there was nothing wrong with our marriage and he is happy. It was just him being selfish because he could. If that bimbo didn't stroke my husband's ego and stayed out of our marriage we wouldn't have had all the pain that goes with not keeping boundaries and respecting your spouse!! you need to respect boundaries and stay out of other peoples marriages. Take responsibility for your actions. Stop blaming other people for what you choose to do. And realize that your behaviour is hurting others including the kids in your situation. Grow up and get a man that is free to be with you. Stop being the home wrecker and acting in such a selfish, destructive, pathetic manner. Too easy!

May 05, 2013
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take responsibilty for your actions!!!!! NEW
by: Diana

I have been reading alot of posts on here! Everyone on here needs to get a grip...from the women who are with MM to the bitter wives of them. I was married for 20 years and am filing for divorce this month. I stayed in my marriage for my daughter (wrong choice but mine). I cheated and was cheated on and I have no issues putting that out there. To those wives who never want to take responsibilty for their actions so be it but I am a big enough woman to say hey my husband cheated because I was not giving him what he needed and vise versa. Ya'll can say what ever you want about me I do not care. Your words cannot hurt me. Until you have walked a mile in my shoes do NOT pass judgement!!! Right now I am in a relatinship with a married man...oops I said it didnt I!!! His wife knows and has met me face to face. He stays for his kids. We lived together for 5 months till I told him to go home to his children because he missed them so much. He lives there in the spare bedroom...how do I know this because he tells me and she told me...she also told me she knows that he LOVES ME and is only there for his boys! She is not happy about it but oh well, it is what it is!!!! We are not all selfish. My boyfriend would have never went back if I did not suggest it. We still see each other all the time and do lots of things together. I only live 10 minutes from him by choice. It is not all about the sex (which is great)....we communicate, we love, we trust (oops yes I trust him with my life), we laugh, he spends the night from time to time....sorry to burst ya'll's (wives and husbands) bubble but you need to step up and look in the mirror...we did not come along and wreak your marriage....you did that all on your own, it was already damaged beyond fixing before we came along....If the men and woman who cheat were getting what they needed in their marriage they would not look elsewhere, this includes myself and my soon to be Ex...sorry but the truth hurts!!!!!

Jan 13, 2012
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ron NEW
by: Anonymous

Remember when you point a finger at someone there are three pointing right back at ya.Bottom line don't do something you wouldn't be proud of.If it's shameful and you have to hide and be deceitful,then it's a bad thing.If it's keeping you up at night,it's a bad thing you're doing,I'm talking about having sex w/ someone else's spouse(bad move).That's nothing to be proud about.You wouldn't want your spouse to do that behind your back.So just don't participate w/ the whole mess.When married people cheat,it's so SELFISH,you want to have your cake and eat it too.Get divorced,then you can be free to date any single person out there.That would be so much less drama.What goes around comes around...

Jan 13, 2012
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in reply to JUDGEMENTAL anonymous NEW
by: Married Woman

Well anonymous, aren't YOU being judgemental with your 'holier than thou' attitude? Telling others what they can and can't say and feel due to their beliefs, values and experience is extremely judgemental and immature. Are you saying that all married women are living in glass houses??? Do you base that view on what all these cheating women are posting here? you must not have much life experience to post such twaddle. Its your thoughs and actions that prove your worth. These cheaters are doing these things behind the spouses back for YEARS at a time. Tell me, what are they doing with their mistakes to redeem their character?? I am so sick of their stories of how terrible it is for THEM. These women are doing very wrong things and for you to stand up for them and say what you have is wrong also. It makes me think that you have been a cheater yourself. Therefore we are all judging you as well. Hit a nerve I see. I think it is you that needs to grow up.

Jan 12, 2012
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wrong NEW
by: Anonymous

People are soooo judgmental and quick to point fingers and call names. Why are you throwing stones if you live in a class house? We all have flaws, and we all mess up in life. Our failures do not define who we are as people. We are ALL capable of hurting others, stealing, cheating, etc. Its what you do with your past mistakes that shapes who you are. Shame on all of you for calling someone you dont even know horrible names. What she did was wrong.........cheating is never ok or the answer...........but thats no reason to stone someone. Grow Up!

Jan 02, 2012
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life is unpredictable NEW
by: ron

You ended up w/a guy who never really loved the girl he got pregnant.He tried to make it work but it didn't.So that's where you came in.When someone goes outside the relationship ,obviously there's Huge problems within it.People should seek help First to try and fix it.If it's not fixable then they should move on.Not have an affair.When two people are happy together affairs rarely happen.Just remember HE CHEATED ON HER.That's how he deals w/not being happy.Now when you guys start to have problems.If he starts to act withdrawn from you,not interested in doing things w/you or sex.Don't be surprized if he is cheating on you.A zebra can't change it's stripes.

Jan 02, 2012
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asshole NEW
by: Anonymous

your a bitch too you should be ashamed of yourself all about you isnt it unbelievable...

Jan 01, 2012
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im happy for u NEW
by: Anonymous

I am in a similar situation and I am finally glad to hear a positive story. So sick of the negative statistics. Good luck to u.

Dec 30, 2011
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agree w/ married woman comments NEW
by: rudy

OK, so now your're with your prized man.With his kids still young,he's going to have to go back n forth with his now ex, much thanks to you.How about child support, alimony? He's going to be busy going to court to deal with these things Alot.Things I'm sure will be getting financially interesting for you two love birds.And always remember Once a cheater, Always a cheater. I hate that old saying ,but it is very true my dear.Watch your back...

Dec 30, 2011
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whore! NEW
by: Married Woman

How dare you fool around with this married man. Who the hell do you think you are to cause such heart ache to his wife and kids??? Their pain is very real. They don't deserve to be treated this way by anyone. You say your so HAPPY. Happy that you have hurt another woman and her kids. Happy that you have taken a husband and father? How did you feel when your fiance cheated on you. you thought it was fine and wright to cheat on this married man? Did you ask the wife if she loved her husband? Just make yoourself happy. What a selfish whore you are! Then you have no shame and brag about it. Disgusting. I hope he cheats on you as well. you deserve it. Then we will see how happy you are then.

Dec 23, 2011
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Love, Schmove NEW
by: Cookie

Married people cheat because they don't love their spouses. Kids or not. They have a connection to them because of the time they spent together and the kids but if you love someone, cheating is not an option. Now, can a married person love someone else? Of course because they are available in this category.The issue though, is "does that unsuspecting spouse" love the cheater? If they do, then it is morally wrong to be with someone that is loved and being committed (even if falsely done so)because then you are contributing to willingly hurting someone you don't even know. That is narcissistic. If the other spouse does not love the "cheater" and finances and kids are the sole purpose for remaining married, then as soon as the kids are old enough and both parties can support themselves, they should part ways. If this doesn't happen then it is a co dependent relationship or better yet...they really do love each other..in which case, the other man/woman is being played a fool.

Dec 23, 2011
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the lady in la la land NEW
by: Anonymous

the old saying goes once a cheater always a cheater, time will tell. so you go on living in la la land. and yes i do agree about the kids it is no good to put kids thru a bad marriage, but there is an option called divorce? so what if there is kids? just stay married and teach them how to have affairs instead.is that the better way. i feel very sad for this woman who thinks she has so much power that she can make this man change for her or that he loves her enough to do so. like i said TIME WILL TELL. and good luck with it . and shame on you for being apart conflicting pain on his children shame on you.your very selfish self-centered and most imortantly self seeking period.you have no right touching married man. let him get a divorce first then go after him. shame on you.

Dec 22, 2011
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To rudy NEW
by: Anonymous

Thank you so much for your nice comment. Things are coming together great. He is an amazing guy and i must say I'm happy i wasn't in a relationship where it drug on, but instead ispend the time we get off from work until the time we go to work in the morning. He is amazing.!

Dec 22, 2011
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Wow NEW
by: Anonymous

I read the post "No longer the Married Women" and read the 1st response from the Anonymous person who called her a "Bitch". Your question was "What about the kids?" Have people in a marriage that is filled with no love at all wonder "What about the kids?" then, I do agree, there is NO REASON at all to cheat, but it happens... Most women who are in a relationship with a married man don't go in expecting to fall in love but many do. That doesn't mean the relationship is not real, and it doesn't mean that the married man's feeling of love for the other woman are not real.. Again it doesn't make it right but it happens.

Dec 19, 2011
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BIG FAT LIAR-- who are you trying to fool anyways? NEW
by: Anonymous

Your a very sick human being, and extremely selfish one at that . what about the kids bitch. one day your head will pop out of your asses and the whole world is going to hear a big boom from it . and if your happy your also a big fat liar too on top of that

Nov 16, 2011
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only happens 5% of the time NEW
by: rudy

In your case things just happen to fall in place at the right time.Happens very rarely.The usual thing that happens 95% of the time is one or the other spouse wants to stay and work it out.And it can drag on for many months.Sometimes it'll work out for them or they may divorce.Then you get tired of waiting around and usually will find an available person.Then when that person becomes available then you find you're in a relationship.Timing is everything in life.Glad it worked out for you..

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