shattered heart

by sean
(usa)

well first off let me start by saying i am happy to have found this site and here goes. I recently found out that the guy who i have been dating since i was eighteen years old has been married for the past four years to someone else. We met in college and he was a good looking, smart and funny guy. It wasn't love at first sight for me but i was single so i decided to give him a chance. Turned out that we had a lot in common and we really hit it off and this guy was the first real boyfriend i had ever had and he was the first guy i had ever had sex with as well.

This relationship started in 1997 and it abruptly ended four days ago. Well he left school and went back home and we decided to remain exclusive with each other and looking back now i should have ended things then. We talked on the phone and he would come visit me at school and the relationship progressed and it was really good. I will say long distance relationships dont work for most people but for us it did and i know that sounds crazy but it did. Now i will get to the part of how yes he cheated and i was stupid and forgave him for it. He also had a child with the other woman and i did break up with him breifly and we reconsiled the realationship. So me being so in love with this man let him get away with murder and i gave him the weapon to commit it by constantly trusting and believing all of his lies. Once we decided to get back togther we start talking about marriage and children because he knew thats wanted i wanted more than anything. He kept putting it off and finally i picked a year and month for us to get married and he agreed with it but little did i know he was carrying around a secret so big that ultimately my world has come to a complete stand still.

So I moved to another city because of my job and yes he did come to see me and he even said he would consider moving to the city after we got married. I moved back to my home state and i got a job close to the town he worked in and everything was going well enough but it got to the point that the only time he ever wanted to see me was on friday and whenever i would call him sometime he would hang up suddenly or i would hear a child crying in the back ground and he always had an excuse for me but because i wanted us to workout so badly i ignored the warning signs because i figured he loved me so much.

Four days ago his wife called my work place and i work at a retail store and his bday was coming up so i bought him a couple of things and i had been with him that friday and he left the items in the trunk of her car and found the receipt with my name on it. You could have picked my face up off of the floor when she said that she was his wife and that they had been together since 1999 around the same time we were dating and that they got married in 2007 and he had been seeing me still the entire 12 years and my heart shattered.

when i confronted him he was very cold and acted like it was nothing and then he left a voice mail on my saying he didnt know where i had gotten the idea that he was my boyfriend and that he was staying with his wife and children. So i had a conversation with his wife and i told her that we never stopped seeing each other and she said she has know about me since they started dating and i replyed that i had no idea who she was and i told her i was done with him. I was the other woman for four years and i didnt have a clue and now i have to put my life back on track because he robbed of any chance of being married with kids at this point in my life and hopefully anyone else who reads my story will realize to listen to the warning signs.

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